


Rick Roll in the Hay

by definitely_yesterday



Category: The Vampire Diaries (TV)
Genre: Bonkai, Cross-Posted on FanFiction.Net, Cross-Posted on Tumblr, Established Relationship, F/M, Humor, Not Beta Read, Not really fluff per se, bonnie/kai - Freeform, it's cute though, kai parker - Freeform, kinda like they haven't told anyone or labelled it until this one shot, maybe sexual humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-28
Updated: 2016-05-28
Packaged: 2018-07-10 17:05:31
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,404
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6996979
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/definitely_yesterday/pseuds/definitely_yesterday
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>One-shot based off the prompt: Imagine your OTP having sex, when all of a sudden Person A starts softly singing "Never Gonna Give You Up." Person B bursts out laughing and they have to stop and compose themselves.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Rick Roll in the Hay

**Author's Note:**

> Author's note: A prequel of sorts to 'You Wanna Go...On A Date With Me.' You don't have to read the original one shot first, in fact, reading this first then reading the original would be probably be more satisfying. I hope you enjoy!

It was New Year’s Eve and not only that it was their first New Year’s Eve together. In fact, up until this time, Bonnie’s friends were unaware that the Bennett witch and the Gemini coven leader had been seeing each other for almost a year. A few months after their friendship had progressed to a relationship, they had been getting ready for bed and Kai was lying under the covers while Bonnie pulled on a tank top to go with her shorts. At that time, Kai had hinted at her telling her friends that they had been dating for the first time. Bonnie vetoed the idea immediately and climbed into bed. 

“Why not?” Kai tilted his head looking at her.

Bonnie ran her hands through her hair, sighing, “Because I don’t feel like being the cause of bloodshed.”

Kai had given her a lopsided grin and replied, “Are you worried that Damon or hero hair will get their asses handed to them?”

Bonnie glared at him and said, “I’m worried that they will hand your ass to _you_. Then I’ll have to patch you up, you’d be whining, I’d be grumbling, it wouldn’t be a pleasant experience.”

Kai said, “Hey!” and he started counting on his fingers, “First of all, I wouldn’t get my ass handed to me.”

Bonnie snorted.

Kai narrowed his eyes at her and continued, “Second of all-“

Bonnie said, “Secondly.”

Kai ignored her, “Second of all, it’s good to hear that you care about my wellbeing.”

Bonnie rolled her eyes.

“Thirdly-” Kai started then continued, “I mean third of all-”

Bonnie laughed interrupting him, “Really?”

Kai shushed her and spoke again, “Third of all, I do not whine.”

Bonnie raised her eyebrows at him, “Are you serious?”

Kai replied, “Name one time you’ve heard me whine.”

“How about that time when we drove an hour and a half to go to that big mall because you said you wanted to take me shopping? Hmmm?”

Kai opened his mouth to defend himself and Bonnie continued, “You spent the entire two hours whining about me trying on clothes.”

Kai spoke, “To be fair, you were getting three sizes of every item you picked up. And then you’d ask me how each looked-”

Bonnie said, “I had to try on different sizes to see how things fit!”

“Then you got mad at me because I said for you to pick what you think looks best,” Kai said.

“Well I needed an opinion. That’s not an opinion,” Bonnie said.

Kai replied, “Would it have mattered what I thought looked good? I mean, what if I chose something and you didn’t agree?”

Bonnie frowned.

Kai said, “Exactly. You would’ve been mad and asked me why I didn’t like it then I’d explain and you’d disagree again. We would’ve been there for double the time with you even madder at me.”

“I was just trying to survive the day.”

Bonnie said, “Whatever.” 

She paused and said, “What about that time Caroline did a surprise visit to my apartment and I asked you to go hide in the bedroom?”

“You whined about having to stop watching Daredevil. After she left 10 minutes later, I told you that you could come out of the bedroom. I said let’s keep watching Daredevil, but you continued to whine,” Bonnie said.

This time Kai frowned. 

Bonnie continued, "You said that the mood had passed. When I didn't know what the hell you were talking about you said, and I quote, 'I was in the Daredevil groove before Little Miss Sunshine showed up and now I'm not in the mood for Daredevil.' "

Kai pressed his lips together in a tight line.

“Oh, and what about that time-” Bonnie started.

Kai interrupted her, “Okay. I get it. I whine occasionally.”

“Can we go to bed now?” Bonnie asked.

Kai nodded and Bonnie turned off the lamp on the side table.

In the almost year of their dating, there had been other times that Kai had brought up her telling her friends about them and Bonnie continued to insist that there would be bloodshed; thus, it wasn’t a good idea.

So when one day Kai called her from Portland and there had been a lull in the conversation, Bonnie had asked him if he would be able to visit to go to a New Year’s Eve party with her at the Salvatores’, he was elated. He had almost asked her what made her change her mind but he thought better of that. It was sometimes hard to get Bonnie to talk about their relationship, he didn’t want to push her when she was obviously taking a risk. Instead he replied calmly, “Of course. I should be able to come in the day before and leave a day or two after New Year’s day.”

Bonnie had said, “Great!”

They had finished chatting and Kai had been a good mood the rest of the day despite being in back-to-back coven meetings for hours.

That had been a few weeks ago. It was now New Year’s Eve and they were getting ready for the Salvatore party that started at 9’o clock. Kai was sitting on the couch wearing a light gray knit sweater and dark blue jeans. It was 9:30 and Kai had been playing on his phone for the last 20 minutes. Bonnie had changed outfits three times and had finally decided on a form fitting green dress and black flats. She insisted that she had to make some changes to her makeup to match the outfit. Kai noted that that had been 10 minutes ago. Kai was now on Urban Dictionary trying to figure out what to ‘get lit’ meant. Ten minutes ago, Bonnie had come out to tell him that she had to alter her makeup and said, “I’m almost ready then we can head out and get lit.”

Kai had smiled and nodded, not knowing what that had meant. However, according to Urban Dictionary, it meant to either get high or drunk. Since he didn’t know Bonnie to be ‘420 friendly’, he decided she meant the latter.

“I’m ready,” Bonnie said.

Kai stood up still looking at his phone then he looked in the direction of her voice while sliding the phone in his back pocket.

Kai smiled and said, “You look great. Gorgeous.”

Bonnie felt her face flush, gave a small smile, and replied, “Thanks.”

When it came to deciding who would be the designated driver, Bonnie insisted he drive. Kai had looked confused, saying, “Why me? I planned on getting embarrassingly drunk and telling everyone about how hot my date is.”

Bonnie rolled her eyes and said, “Well, I’m the one that’ll need to get drunk after I deal with my friends when they see me with you and then I have to explain the situation.”

Kai prodded, “The situation?”

Bonnie pressed her lips together, tossed the keys to her car to him, and headed towards the front door. She had opened the door then turned and said, “Yes, the situation. Our situation. Where in you’re my-” Bonnie paused.

Kai had raised his eyebrows and supplied, “Boyfriend?”

Bonnie nodded said gesturing, “And I’m your…. girlfriend.”

Bonnie sighed, “Let’s just go.”

She walked out the front door.

Kai followed behind her smiling.

Once they had parked outside of the boarding house, Kai had opened his door and gotten out of the car. He walked to the passenger’s side waiting for Bonnie. After a minute, Bonnie hadn’t moved. Kai knocked on the window. He saw Bonnie run her hands through her hair and then she opened the door, stepping out into the night.

Kai searched her face and asked, “Are you alright?” 

“We don’t have to go if you aren’t ready…” he continued.

Bonnie looked up into his eyes and bit her lip. She shook her head and said, “No, let’s go and have some fun.”

As soon as they entered the Salvatore home, they were bombarded by music. Kai had placed his hand on the small of Bonnie’s back as they both surveyed the crowd. After she saw someone come out of the kitchen with a red plastic cup, she reached back and grabbed Kai’s hand. She then guided them through the throng of people to the kitchen. Upon entering the kitchen, Bonnie made a beeline for the beer keg then she saw a multitude of wine and liquor bottles on the counter.

“So many choices,” she said.

Kai laughed, “How about we get you a shot and then beer from here on out? Sound good?”

“I mean I did bring a bottle of tequila for us to drink since you’ve never had it. And you have yet to see me on tequila.”

Bonnie nodded smiling and said, “I forgot about the tequila. I’ll skip the shot and just have a few beers then. The real fun will be later.”

Kai smiled, grabbed cups, and began filling them. Bonnie was leaning her hip against the counter and reading the labels of the liquor bottles when she heard Caroline’s voice nearby.

“Have you heard from Bonnie? I thought she’d be here by now,” Caroline had said.

Bonnie then heard the younger Salvatore brother reply, “No, I’m sure she’s on her way.”

“I’m just worried…” Caroline said, entering the kitchen, and looking at her phone.

Stefan, following behind Caroline, said, “I’m sure she’s fine. Give her another 30 minutes then we’ll call her.”

Stefan had been looking at Caroline and lifted his head to see, Kai Parker looking at them curiously as he filled a cup with beer and Bonnie near him leaning against the counter.

Stefan stopped and grabbed Caroline’s arm halting her.

“What are you-” Caroline started.

Kai chirped, “Hey! There’s Broody and Little Miss Sunshine!”

Stefan was eyeing Kai cautiously. Caroline looked up from her phone, stiffened, and glared at Kai. Bonnie pushed off the counter and stood beside Kai. He placed a cup of beer on the table in front of her and took a sip from his beer.

“Bonnie-” Stefan started when Caroline interjected.

“Um, what is he doing here?” the blonde vampire asked.

Behind the table Kai grabbed Bonnie’s hand and gave it a gentle reassuring squeeze. Bonnie replied, “It’s good to see you, too, Care.”

Caroline raised her eyebrows and Stefan just looked on, seemingly calmly.

Bonnie took a deep breath to settle her nerves and said, “He’s here because I invited him.”

“Why would you-” Caroline began.

“He’s here because I wanted to spend New Years with my boyfriend,” Bonnie said quickly.

Stefan raised his eyebrows surprised.

“Boyfriend?” Caroline exclaimed, “He’s your boyfriend?”

“Yes and I have been for a while,” Kai chimed in.

Caroline’s mouth opened and closed.

Stefan spoke up, “Uh, well, I’m glad you guys could make it.”

Just when Caroline turned to gape at Stefan, Elena walked in.

“Why are you guys blocking the doorway?” Elena said, “I wanna do a shot of that whipped vodka.”

Stefan stepped aside letting Elena pass him. She stepped around him and saw Bonnie and Kai standing next to each other. Kai looked amused and Bonnie looked worried. 

Elena frowned, “What’s going on? Why is Kai here?”

Caroline finally exclaimed, “That’s what I was asking!”

Bonnie looked at Elena and said, “Well, as I told Caroline and Stefan, I wanted to come to the party and spend New Years with my boyfriend. That’s why Kai is here.”

Elena smiled, rounded the table, and brought Bonnie into a hug.

Elena said, “I knew you had been really cheerful and glowing for a while now and I figured it was a guy but I was waiting for you to tell us. I’m so happy for you, Bonnie.”

Bonnie hugged Elena back and said, “Thank you, Elena.”

When they separated, Elena turned to Caroline and said, “I told you there was a guy, Care.”

Caroline sulked, “I owe you a spa day then.”

Stefan coughed out a laugh, Kai chuckled, and Bonnie glared at him first then Stefan.

Kai stated, “Well now that’s over,” he turned to Bonnie and asked, “How many beers do you need before I can get you to dance?”

It turned out about four beers was what it took to get Bonnie to start grinding on Kai. Kai had cut her off at that point. When she went to protest, he reminded her that there was tequila back at her house and she had brightened and said “I forgot! I need to be able to see and remember you on tequila.”

About 45 minutes before midnight, while Bonnie and Kai were dancing, Damon having heard about them being together and managed to find them. He had stomped up to Kai who was too distracted by Bonnie rubbing against him to notice. Thus, Bonnie was the first to notice Damon standing in front of them. It was when she stopped dancing that Kai looked up.

“What the fuck, Bonnie?” Damon yelled over the music.

Bonnie held up a hand to the obviously drunk older Salvatore and said, “Damon, calm down.”

“You’re seriously dating this asshole?” said Damon. 

Kai had smirked at the vampire and said cheerily, “Yep!”

Damon looked over Bonnie’s head at the coven leader. He sneered at him and took a step forward.

Bonnie step forward and pressed her hand to Damon’s chest and said, “Damon, look at me.”

Damon’s jaw clenched and he looked down into the witch’s green eyes.

“Listen to me. I’m only going to say this once. I care about Kai. He is my boyfriend. You need to respect that. If you so much as lay a hand on him and I find out, our friendship. The friendship that took years to build will be done.”

Damon parted his lips then licked them, grated his teeth, then said mockingly, “I won’t hurt your precious sociopath.”

Bonnie relaxed and said, “Thank you, I really appreciate-”

Damon looked at Kai and spat, “Unless you hurt her in anyway then all bets are off. You hurt her then expect your head on a spike.”

Kai grinned widely and said, “If I hurt her, I will take myself out.”

Damon grunted and looked back down at Bonnie. He pulled her into a hug and whispered into her ear, “If he does anything you don’t like or hurts you, let me know and I’ll take care of it.”

Damon didn’t see Bonnie roll her eyes but she whispered back, “If he hurts me, I will make him suffer myself then call you, so you can have a piece.”

Damon laughed, gave her a squeeze, and released her.

Damon eyed Kai one more time before walking away. 

Bonnie turned to Kai and wrapped her arms around his neck and said into his ear, “Let’s get out of here. Whaddya say?”

Kai leaned down to her ear and responded, “Yeah, let’s go.”

Once they arrived at her apartment almost 40 minutes later, Kai had brought out the tequila. When midnight struck, they had kissed and taken yet another shot. It was now 1:30 in the morning and Bonnie was sitting up on the couch with Kai’s head lying in her lap as they chatted and took the occasional shot. Bonnie hadn’t done a stand test in a bit, but she was pretty sure she was slightly beyond tipsy now. Kai had been taking two shots for every shot she took. He was definitely drunk. 

Kai closed his eyes and said, “I think I’m lit.”

Bonnie had pressed her hand to her mouth and giggled.

Kai opened his eyes and looked at her, “What’s funny?”

“You said you’re lit,” Bonnie said and started giggling again.

“Why is that funny?” Kai questioned.

Bonnie took a deep breath and tried to stop the giggle fit she was having and managed to say, “Because, it’s you. It’s modern day slang. Do you even know what that means?”

Kai scoffed, “Of course! It means to be drunk. And I know plenty of ‘modern day’ lingo. Thank you very much.”

“Oh, really?” Bonnie asked.

“Yeah, like swole. Hangry which I find myself being during a day of meetings. Truffle butter, which who needed to name that? Couldn’t we as a society just assume that it didn’t happen and thus need not be spoken about? Kinkshaming. It’s one of my favorite things to do. I kinkshame whoever I can back in Portland,” Kai said.

Bonnie laughed at each term he brought up. She pressed her hand to her face.

“As a side note, I think that telling your friends went well. Ya know?” Kai said.

Bonnie ran her fingers through his hair and nodded, “Though, I was sure Damon was gonna insist on fighting you for my honor.”

Kai laughed. He then sat up and stood up from the couch wobbling a bit.

He looked down at Bonnie and said, “I don’t know about you but I think that’s enough tequila for me.”

Bonnie smiled and said, “Me too.”

Kai said, “To bed then.”

He bent down and went to slip one of his arms under her knees and the other behind her back. Bonnie squirmed and said, “No! Kai, no!”

Kai pulled his arms back and straightened, “What’s wrong?”

Bonnie looked at him amused, “You’re drunk and I don’t feel like being dropped.”

Kai opened his mouth then reconsidered and replied, “Fair enough.”

“Get to the bedroom and I’ll turn of the lights,” Bonnie said, “I’ll clean this all up in the morning.”

Kai nodded and headed to the bedroom. He stripped down to his boxer briefs and slid under the covers. He made himself sit up and lean against the headboard to stay awake to wait for Bonnie. After it seemed like an eternity, Bonnie walked into the bedroom. Kai watched as she stripped off her dress and tossed it into the laundry basket followed by her bra. She walked over to the bed and slipped beneath the covers. 

Kai had let his eyes drift close when Bonnie spoke into his ear, “I can think of a good way to end the night.” She then nipped his ear lobe.

Kai’s eyes snapped open and he suddenly felt awake. He pounced on her. The foreplay was short but satisfying with Kai insisting on making her orgasm at least two times before they had sex. Kai was now hovering over Bonnie and entering her. Bonnie moaned and Kai’s breath hitched once he was buried to the hilt. He had started moving and was thrusting deep into the witch. After a particularly deep thrust in which Bonnie moaned loudly, she heard Kai softly saying something.

Bonnie held her breath and tried not to make a sound to hear what he was saying.

Kai was singing, “Never gonna give you up. Never gonna let you down. Never gonna run around and desert you. Never gonna-”

Bonnie let out a loud laugh. Kai stopped thrusting.

He looked dazed down at her, “What?”

Bonnie had looked at his confused face and dissolved into a fit of laughter.

She gasped out, “You were just singing.”

Kai frowned, “I was?”

Bonnie was still laughing with tears in her eyes now. She nodded, “You-” she snorted laughter, “You rick-rolled me.”

Bonnie repeated, “You rick-rolled me,” she continued, “During sex.”

She cackled.

Kai was looking at her like she was crazy. He asked, “What does rick-rolled mean?”

Bonnie managed to catch her breath and said, “You were singing a Rick Astley song that people put randomly in things or send to people then people say they’ve been rick-rolled. It’s funny but becomes infuriating after a while but you unknowingly singing it…”

She began giggling again.

Kai was silent for a minute and said quietly, “I ruined the moment, didn’t I?”

Bonnie cupped his face and tried to school her face to not look like she was on a brink of busting out laughing again. She cleared her throat and spoke, “Kai, no, well, maybe a little. Yes, actually.”

Kai dropped his head to her shoulder and sighed, “I’m sorry.”

He rolled off her and drew her into his arms. 

Bonnie sat up a bit, turned his head towards her, and kissed him. She smiled at him, “We can try again tomorrow when the tequila is out of your system.”

She laid back against his chest and heard him grumble, “I told you, you didn’t want to see me on tequila.”


End file.
